Mommy-cation

In the last post, I commented that the lack of adult interaction was the hardest part of being a full-time mommy. Well, that feeling continued after writing that post. Combine that with just missing Jason and you have a full on meltdown in the making. I don't mean the kind of missing that comes from someone being away, it is what happens while life happens all around us. Jason and I juggled the kids on his off days as we ran errands. I watched the boys while he took the dog to the vet or he kept the boys while I went to the dentist, etc. Then it seemed that on the days he worked we still sort of vegged in the evenings instead of actually spending quality time together as a couple. Then it happened. As someone I know calls it, I became "broke down with the motherhood." It's that feeling of defeat where you just have had enough or at least it is for me. So last Tuesday afternoon, I announced to Jason that I was leaving for the night. I have never done this before, and at first I think my poor husband thought I was kidding. I remember one of the nurses that I used to work with saying that one night she packed a bag and drove to the next town to just spend the night alone. That suddenly sounded like the best idea on the planet. My plan was a little deflated because Jason had some charting that he had to finish, so I didn't actually leave until about 5:30 after I had fed and bathed the boys. I drove to Tybee, got a room and crashed. IT.WAS.FABULOUS. I think the lady at the desk thought I had had some kind of huge fight with my husband or something, but I didn't care. I ate dinner all alone, feeding no one but myself. I think I heard angels singing... I took a walk on the beach, and that night I slept knowing that at 6:30 I wouldn't have to get up to feed someone. I got ready the next morning, went to breakfast, and drove home - crying on the way. It just wasn't long enough, and I felt so guilty admitting that. I still feel guilty admitting that, but it is true. Sometimes it is nice to get away and actually remember what it was like to just be you versus thinking about taking care of anyone else in the world. I forgot what that was like. That was the first night I have spent away from Jake since May 2011 and the first night I have ever been away from Connor. Maybe no one else feels like this, and hooray for you if that's the case. I know as they get older, vacationing with the kids will be fun, but for now a vacation is getting away from the kids. I enjoy going to dinner or spending time with my husband without my children around. Someone asked me if Jason was upset that he had to take care of the boys. I think my head might have spun around all crazy. Huh? These are his children, and he is just as capable of taking care of them as I am. I would not have chosen to have children with someone who wasn't okay with taking care of our children. Duh...

On a lighter note, October has been a whirlwind. It has flown by, and November is already knocking at the door. Jake and Connor are going to be a pirate and a parrot for Halloween, and Jake is excited about his costume. He is very into all things pirate right now. Now is the season for Fall festivals and such, and I love this time of year. We went to the bamboo farm a few Saturdays ago. Jake is just now getting scared of things and while he wanted to talk about the helicopter, he didn't want to really get close. Same thing with the horses. Of course, we didn't figure the last one out until it was a little too late.



The balloons were a way safer choice

That afternoon was Connor's first OU/Texas game which is a big dang deal in this house.

We headed to pick out a pumpkin a few afternoons ago. Jake enjoyed looking at all the "big pumps" and Connor just thought it was cool to hang out with Jake.

Pumpkin envy


Last night, we decided to carve the pumpkin. Jake thought it was a good idea for all of about 8 seconds, then picking up acorns seemed like a much better plan. The squirrels have demolished the acorns so it took some skill to actually find whole acorns (see below pic). Jake took his little bucket all around the yard. When I asked him if he was going to feed the squirrels his acorns, he looked at me for a second, took out an acorn and laid it on the patio, then yelled, "Kwurl (squirrel, for all you who don't speak Jakanese), eat" like he was ringing the squirrel dinner bell. Upon seeing the completed pumpkin, Jake told us he was scared - great... haha - here are some pics.

Before

Taking off the "hat" as Jake called it

Focus, people

Told you

One thing that has helped the feeling of just being "broke down with the motherhood" was getting out and taking some pics the other day. My nephew recently got home from Germany after getting out of the Army. He has been in Germany for the past 2 years. He also recently got married, and so he and his wife visited Savannah (and other parts of Georgia) before they headed to Texas to live. I got them to let me take some pictures while they were here. To do something that I enjoy doing was really good for the soul :) Here are a few of their pictures.

I think all this month has taught me that balance is the key. There must be a balance of alone time, husband time, kid time, and time to do things that you truly enjoy doing. Hopefully, I can remember this lesson that October has given me and put it in effect every month. Until next time...